Today’s briefing:
— Hot Diplomatic Girl Summer
— Two fees on Hormuz traffic?
— How to get diplomatic immunity for your pet
Your Insider’s briefing:
— Hot Diplomatic Girl Summer
— Two fees on Hormuz traffic?
— How to get diplomatic immunity for your pet
Good morning {{first_name | Intriguer}}. There’s a fine line between corporate confidence and outright hubris, and boy is Chipotle straddling it via a first restaurant in Mexico.
Now don’t get me wrong — I love a barbacoa bowl with a side of extra-charge guacamole as much as the next guy (unless the next guy is Timotheé Chalamet), but the idea of gringos selling burritos in Mexico is giving peak “sell fire to a dragon” energy.
Sure, it could end up an accidental hit, like KFC somehow becoming a Christmas Eve tradition across Japan. But hawking a $15 assembly-line version back to the OG pioneers of UNESCO-protected cuisine? We can all agree it’s bold.
Anyway, US corporations aren’t the only ones booking high-risk trips to foreign shores this week, so let’s check the departure boards for a few intrepid world leaders, shall we?
 | Managing Editor Jeremy Dicker |
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Year of the day
2021
That’s when Rockefeller’s Ruchir Sharma argues China’s economy peaked, before its global GDP share fell from 18% to 16.5%. He warns AI won’t be enough to halt the trend. Meanwhile, China just recorded 27% export growth (YoY) for June, its fastest since 2021.
Travel inspo.
The tell-tale signs of a northern summer have begun: those ‘out of office’ replies are ghosting like your college group-project partner, thermometers are melting like cheap gelato, and heads of state are racking up more miles than a 22-year-old on Contiki.
So shall we take a squiz at all these presidential itineraries? Let’s start with…
🇫🇷 Emmanuel Macron: the perpetual motion machine
Looking for a summer adventure? Take notes from France’s Macron, who just became the first major Western leader to visit Damascus since Al-Sharaa ousted the Assad regime.
Why? Sure, they signed MOUs on everything from healthcare to transport, but Macron also wants to re-establish French influence, secure reconstruction contracts, and push for a moderate transition that prevents further chaos spilling into Europe.
Meanwhile, al-Sharaa gets immediate legitimacy at home and abroad, more balance against Turkish, Qatari, and Russian influence, and hopes of more European investment.
We say ‘hopes’ because the optics of Macron strolling Damascus in a new united Syria were overshadowed by two bombs near his hotel — nobody’s claimed responsibility yet.
Returning home, Macron barely had time to buff his aviators before hosting ~25 leaders from Europe’s Coalition of the Willing, though willing to do what is still TBC — Macron’s pledge to send Ukraine more Rafales and arms licensing was overshadowed by word Europe just bought record amounts of LNG from the invaders’ own flagship Yamal plant!
But Macron isn’t the only world leader unveiling his summer travel bod. Look at…
🇮🇳 Narendra Modi: the diaspora darling
Everyone has that friend from college who’s inexplicably on constant vacation, and for world leaders that friend is India’s Narendra Modi — the guy has now snapped selfies in 11 countries across three continents in two-ish months!
Why the sudden wanderlust? Maybe it’s a three-quarter-life crisis. Maybe it’s his new EU and New Zealand trade deals. Maybe it’s Maybelline. But we’d also add…
a) Fuel crisis gripes aside, huge crowds of Indian expats chanting “Modi Modi” play well back home, appeal to his aspirational middle class, and reinforce his statesman image.
b) We also wonder if his Indonesia-Australia-NZ leg is a response to the US dropping ‘Indo’ from its US Pacific Command name (implying India’s waning clout), while rival Pakistan gets more US love as an active mediator.
Catch flights, not feelings, right? Then let’s catch up with…
🇮🇶 Ali al-Zaidi: the survivor on a sales trip
Iraq’s new PM has touched down in the US ahead of an expected Trump summit this week, with a packed agenda that really revolves around oil: 90% of Iraq’s oil traditionally exits via Hormuz, but the Iran war has forced Iraq to slash output while it finds a new exit.
Enter the Kirkuk–Baniyas pipeline connecting northern Iraq’s oilfields to Syria’s Mediterranean coast, then out to those sweet sweet buyers abroad. The pipe has been around since the 50s, but Saddam Hussein closed it in the 80s after Syria sided with Iran in the Iran-Iraq war. America’s 2003 invasion of Iraq then did it serious damage.
Ali’s hope now? He needs foreign cash and Syrian stability to revive this pipeline, and he sees the US as key to both. Ditto, Trump will see value in any Hormuz bypass right now, let alone one already flirting with US investors like TI Capital.
Okay now we’re schvitzing in this Iraqi desert, so let’s cool off way up north with…
🇨🇳 Wang Yi: the Nordic fixer
Trouble in your relationship? Nothing a steamy sauna can’t fix. At least, that’s the strategy China’s top envoy Wang Yi hoped might work on his four-country trip around the Nordics.
Why? His lightning six-day tour through Denmark, Sweden, Finland, and Norway was part charm offensive, part “near-Arctic state” cosplay, and part just shaping EU-China ties from a different (cardinal) direction: with Brussels threatening tariff walls to close a yawning trade deficit, China’s export-reliant economy faces more pressure.
So Wang did what Wang does: divide and conquer. He was hoping a bit of face-time in Europe’s wealthy, tech-heavy Nordic capitals might secure China’s position in their green-tech supply chains, and blunt their enthusiasm for any further EU protectionism.
No doubt the Nordics in turn asked why Beijing is helping Russian aggression on their doorstep, though perhaps Wang asked why the US was threatening to yoink Greenland?
Anyway, safe travels, everyone. And with so many politicians in the air, be sure to pack those noise-cancelling headphones.
Intrigue’s Take
If we had to draw parallels from all this travel (and we literally do), it’d be these four…
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Intrigue’s Take
If we had to draw parallels from all this travel (and we literally do), it’d be these four.
First, our international order feels like it’s entering warp speed (by diplomacy standards at least): you’ve got Macron strolling through Damascus before the Assad dust even settles, while Iraq’s young new billionaire leader pitches US investors on the pipeline DC blew up when he was a school-kid! There’s no pause button in sight.
Second, the sheer volume of leader movement suggests folks now sense a window of opportunity (or whatever is the opposite: a cellar of risk?). With things moving rapidly, leaders are hustling to maximise their advantage, rather than let rivals fill the gaps.
Third, there’s the shape of all this travel — it used to be anchored around the big dates (UNGA, G20, APEC etc), but that accelerating pace above means leader movements are now giving way to a proliferation of mini-lateral huddles and rapid-fire bilateral dashes: you need mini solutions now, rather than broader gridlock later.
And fourth, everyone is hedging: Modi going East? Sure. Wang going West? Why not. Macron going South? Do it. An ex-jihadi up at Davos? Abso-freaking-lutely.
But is it just us, or does it feel like the more our leaders fly, the less our world feels steered. Anyway, safe travels to them all.
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Meanwhile, elsewhere…
🇮🇷 IRAN — Hormuz blockade back on.
Amid what the Emiratis are condemning as a “brazen” Iranian attack on two more tankers near Hormuz, President Trump has declared the US naval blockade on Iran’s ships (“and customers”) is now “back on”. His tweet suggests it’ll remain open for everyone else, subject to a new fee (20% of cargo value!) to reimburse US costs. (Guardian)
Comment: So… ship captains still get targeted by Iran, but now also pay the US a 20% fee (~$30M for a full supertanker)? Hard to see that working… Meanwhile, Iranians have leapt on Trump’s implicit acknowledgement that whoever runs the Strait should (per the regime’s new demand) get to charge a fee. But the most revealing news might be reports the Emiratis are now working to build another Hormuz bypass — at this rate, maybe it’ll be ready before a ceasefire actually holds? Brent is now back over $80 a barrel, but that still feels low for war in Hormuz — the market is still pricing in a messy if ultimately contained standoff.
🇾🇪 YEMEN — Airport drama.
The Houthis have fired ballistic missiles and drones at Saudi Arabia, framed as retaliation for an earlier Saudi attack reportedly aimed at preventing a Houthi delegation from landing after Khamenei’s funeral in Iran. (AP)
Comment: The most serious escalation of Saudi-Houthi violence in years, the message is that the Houthis remain a reliable proxy for Iran, presenting another possible curve-ball for US efforts to wrap the above war.
🇨🇳 CHINA — Another one bites the dust.
Xi Jinping has expelled former Xinjiang party chief and Politburo member Ma Xingrui from the ruling party on corruption charges. Ma is now the third member of China’s elite Politburo booted since 2025. (CNA)
Comment: The names and ranks change, but the message remains the same: nobody, no matter how senior, is safe from Xi’s purge if they fall out of favour or become too powerful.
🇭🇺 HUNGARY — Presidential drama.
Péter Magyar has used his party’s new super-majority to oust Hungary’s ceremonial president, widely regarded as a loyalist to Hungary’s former strongman, Viktor Orbán. (Euractiv)
Comment: Magyar is wasting no time in de-Orbánising Hungary’s institutions while he can. But if he goes too hard too fast, he runs the risk of being painted an authoritarian like his predecessor (who’s now levelling that exact accusation).
🇿🇦 SOUTH AFRICA — Diamond blues.
Diamond giant De Beers is shuttering South Africa’s largest diamond mine for two years to cut costs amid collapsing prices. (Bloomberg $)
Comment: Synthetic diamonds and weak luxury demand are achieving what sanctions and activists never quite managed to pull off.
🇮🇩 INDONESIA — Anniversary silence.
14 nations (🇺🇸🇦🇺🇨🇦🇪🇪🇩🇪🇮🇹🇯🇵🇱🇻🇱🇹🇳🇿🇵🇭🇷🇴🇸🇮🇬🇧) have marked the 10th anniversary of a Hague tribunal’s landmark ruling against China’s vast ‘nine-dash line’ claiming the South China Sea, while Beijing has reiterated its rejection of that ruling as “illegal, null and void”. Most nations overlapping with China’s nine-dash line have issued their own anniversary statements, though Indonesia has stayed silent. (RFA)
Comment: Indonesia formally dunked (technical term) on China’s nine-dash line years ago, noting it “clearly lacks international legal basis”. So why suddenly so gun-shy? The current president (Prabowo) is a more transactional operator, and probably doesn’t want to rock the boat with his biggest customer.
🇹🇹 TRINIDAD AND TOBAGO — Data centres on the beach.
In a reported first for the region, Port of Spain has signed major deals with US firms Hummingbird and EY LLP, paving the way for possible new 150MW and 300MW data centres. (Independent)
Comment: Trinidad and Tobago makes sense given its natural gas, political stability, and strategic location, but the announcement is already rattling locals grappling with chronic water shortages.
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Plea of the day
Courtesy of our resident meme-lord, @DickerPicss
We’ve built an entire marketing strategy right there in the chasm between diplomatic expectation and reality, but sometimes even meme-lords can’t beat reality: the UK’s Foreign Office just did the world a service and published a list of the silliest requests travellers have made to British embassies abroad. Our favourite traveller queries include:
Where to get blonde highlights in Jordan
How to get a refund for an unsatisfactory meal in Nigeria, and
One extra-ambitious caller in Georgia sought diplomatic immunity… for pets?
Foreign ministries share these chuckles from time to time — Australia’s all-timers include a request for more towels at a Bali resort, and come babysit my kids while I get dinner?
But believe it or not, there’s a purpose behind the laughs: it’s about gently educating travellers around what embassies can do, pushing back on expectation creep, and freeing up resources for diplomats to do what they do best: carrying ministers’ bags.
Today’s poll
What type of vacationer are you?
Yesterday’s poll: What do you think Iran's latest kill-list means most?
🎯 They'll actually try to kill all 13 (19%)
✊ It's just internal propaganda (41%)
🌍 It's just external propaganda (38%)
✍️ Other (write in!) (2%)
Your two cents:
✊ G.W: “Why make the effort to publish a list when they could just action it? Because they don't intend to. They're maybe hoping some radicalised nutter will do it for them.”
🎯 D : “They will have legitimate efforts in progress, but I doubt they will succeed.”
✍️ S.G : “A hit against a key international enemy of the state would definitely be on brand and a coup on the global stage as well as domestically. BUT, potential retaliation could be a deterrent. The anxiety, expense and uncertainty of the ‘threat’ is a much more effective weapon.”